I’ve spoken about this before, how anniversaries uninvitingly become a point of comparison, you start walking down that road comparing how things were this exact same day last year, and how they are today. It need not even be related to what event completes a year today but something that happened around or on this day. It all starts to flash in front of you, and you find yourself analyzing how good or bad things are today.
While one is at it, do you feel like you are stuck in a loop? It’s like, of course every year comes with different experiences, you visit different places, meet new people, eat at new restaurants, fall for different people, yet even after all this, it all looks simulated.
Sure you know you’ve grown at work, gotten a bigger house/car, refined the kind of people you like, yet you feel like you started at point A and find yourself at the same spot A, only through different routes every year.
How does one trust oneself when they have graphically grown at most aspects in their life, year by year, yet they never feel different? What would that little motivation still lingering in could do when you still feel the things you felt a year ago or even the years before that?
Well the answer lays in introspection, and a few books too.
One can’t shed off feelings, wear them out or completely forget about them, but with time, you don’t feel them as profoundly as before. You don’t let them affect you as before. These feelings seem familiar, sometimes your reaction to them feels familiar too, except you’ve gotten thicker, faster at dealing with them. So there’s just one step, keep moving, keep doing the things you like to do, and even though you feel like you are stuck in a loop, you are actually in a circular set of stairs, probably still there but now higher, and closer to a better place.
Dual Cheers 